A Tad Off Subject But Important

     A few nights ago, before I could get to the computer, I had felt the need to cry.  Not really over anything, just one of those cries that just lets loose some things that you did not think were needed to let loose. 
Well, I found that I could not cry.
That in itself, for me, was scary.  What kind of person am I, that I do not know how to cry? (thinking about writing a poem for that) Now, I have come to a conclusion for this, and I find it terrifying.  A little history on myself if you will.  My dad had always told me from ever since I could comprehend what he was saying was that I was not to cry unless I was physically dieing, broken, or bleeding.  He never took into account the idea that my emotions were a valid reason to cry.
     And now, years later down the road at age 17, I found I could not cry.  Heck, I couldn't even cry over the fact that I could not.  Well, ok, I shed a few tears, but it terrifies me!  If I cannot cry, what of my other emotions?  Are they so buried that I cannot express them anymore as well?
Sad to say, I am not even crying as I type this up.  I am crying internally, but outwardly I look calm-ish.  But, mostly, I am terrified. 
     I remember many times over the years asking Jehovah why He gave us emotions, because each time I was emotionally hurt by words people had said to me.  I had come to the realization that emotions help us connect.  However, a few nights ago made me wonder if I could connect at all, much less feel the Holy Spirit move.  I must ask Jehovah what exactly all this means....
Worried,